just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
