It's Friday. Sex?
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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