And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
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