i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
