His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
