Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(519): View more from Ontario

dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.

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(519): dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto. http://tfl.nu/omlc

Replies (40) Good night (715) Bad night (3426)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.

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(856): so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug. http://tfl.nu/yra7

Replies (36) Good night (6691) Bad night (656)
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(972): View more from Texas

Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?

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(972): Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life? http://tfl.nu/jl0s

Replies (34) Good night (3164) Bad night (866)
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(912): View more from Georgia

just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart

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(912): just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart http://tfl.nu/ug8y

Replies (27) Good night (17076) Bad night (990)
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(740): View more from Ohio

Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?

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(740): Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case? http://tfl.nu/5skf

Replies (17) Good night (4974) Bad night (685)
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(810): View more from Michigan

She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.

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(810): She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again. http://tfl.nu/2zep

Replies (1) Good night (3183) Bad night (778)
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(309): View more from Illinois

I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.

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(309): I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking. http://tfl.nu/amrn

Replies (5) Good night (4739) Bad night (885)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy

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(651): I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy http://tfl.nu/d161

Replies (18) Good night (2207) Bad night (804)
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(831): View more from California

The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.

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(831): The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half. http://tfl.nu/bj5u

Replies (1) Good night (1628) Bad night (1007)
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(720): View more from Colorado

So you met him?

(1-720): View more from Colorado

More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.

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(720): So you met him? (1-720): More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home. http://tfl.nu/2r4i

Replies (1) Good night (1411) Bad night (562)
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(831): View more from California

He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!

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(831): He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?! http://tfl.nu/h0ux

Replies (20) Good night (511) Bad night (1138)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....

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(775): Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW.... http://tfl.nu/zpmo

Replies (6) Good night (1148) Bad night (370)
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(770): View more from Georgia

Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?

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(770): Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right? http://tfl.nu/rafd

Replies (3) Good night (533) Bad night (241)
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(707): View more from California

Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.

(425): View more from Washington

I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.

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(707): Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning. (425): I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation. http://tfl.nu/7xvm

Replies (3) Good night (552) Bad night (266)
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(954): View more from Florida

I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.

(941): View more from Florida

Oh at the liquor store again?

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(954): I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board. (941): Oh at the liquor store again? http://tfl.nu/01vl

Replies (0) Good night (462) Bad night (168)

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