Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize