Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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