i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
