my mouth tastes like poor choices
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize