You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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