If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
