drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
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