omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
