carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
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