I will die if light touches me.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I see more hoeing in ur future
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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