i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
PANTIES FOUND
Pooping to opera.
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