But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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