He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
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