You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
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