I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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