My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
