And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
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They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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