Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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