Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
