she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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