i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
