Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
