is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
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Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
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Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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