On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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