I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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