Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night