omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence