i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
