So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
