He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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