can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize