so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
lets start a swedish sibling band together
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
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You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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