office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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