i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
and i looked up. we had an audience...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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