Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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