And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize