So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
