He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize