At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I puked a lego.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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