so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize