found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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