yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
