I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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