"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
