How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
