My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize