Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
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Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize